• Ryan Malaschak

    Co-Commander of S.S. Slaps

    Graphic Designer

    When I am not making stickers and floating through space you can find me at various race tracks and soccer matches. Not a participant, but a spectator.

    Currently binging - True Blood. It's okay I guess.
    Currently Listening to - Varials

    Fun Fact:

    When I was 12 years old, my friends and I convinced an entire neighborhood that I was a foreign exchange student from Czechoslovakia. This went on for an entire summer. It abruptly ended when a dog bit me in my ass through a picket fence and I suddenly lost my 'accent.'

  • Eric Parker

    Co-Commander of S.S. Slaps

    Graphic Designer
    Production Management

    Mostly I just think about illustration, design, stickers, and tacos. I’d be willing to trade stickers for tacos, and while Ryan’s also a fan, he says it’s not a viable business model. Which is fair, the electric company doesn’t accept cojita cheese as payment, and this space ship doesn’t run on pico de gallo either.
    The more I think about it, does anyone even know how a taco based market system would work? How would taxes function? The tortillas would certainly be stale by the time the refund hits. So I’m left to search the distant places of the galaxy, hoping to find a utopian example of taco based economics or some strange planet where it rains delicious hand held meals.

  • Jess Willhite

    Command Module Pilot of S.S. Slaps

    Lead Printer
    Shipping & Receiving

    Meet Jess, our legendary Command Module Pilot. When she is not reaching for the stars, exploring the great beyond, and printing sweet things, you can find her coloring and training Pokemon. Jess is also known to partake in the listening of sick jams.

  • Haley Thurston

    Lunar Module Pilot of S.S. Slaps

    Shipping and Receiving
    Customer Service

    Haley, our Lunar Module Pilot extraordinaire, always strives for greatness on Earth and in outer space. She loves to explore the giant rings of Saturn and the vast craters of Mars. But when she lands on Earth, you might catch her playing Animal Crossing, eating her favorite cuisines, or even sewing beautiful creations at home.